perplexed by an unsolicited package

masonry men in Berlin

This is the perfect blogpost for tumblr. That site still confuses and irritates me, but I’ve been spending more time there and eventually I’ll understand how to better create tumblr content.

But…this: what I’m about to write…it’s not a full blogpost. It’s an unfinished thought. It’s the beginning of a story and the promise of more to come. Perfect for microblogging.

Though I don’t post something here everyday, I do try to polish my work before I throw it up here. As you know, I am particularly fond of whimsy and when I employ a bit of it, I get the best response. I’ve somehow found and attracted a tribe of bloggers whose humour I appreciate and who *get* me. Not sure how it happened all of a sudden, but I’m very appreciative.

Enough introduction…on to the story I came here for.

The other day, I received a package in the mail with a book in it. Because of our work, my wife and I get quite a bit of unsolicited material. Brochures, books, and a wide variety of samples arrive by post and it seems there’s always something that needs to be assessed.

But this package was somehow different. For one thing, the letter accompanying the book was hand-typed. Haven’t seen that in a while. Secondly, the only contact information was an address. A street address.

No telephone. No fax. Nothing.

Most intriguing of all? No website. No email address.

Weird, eh? That’s what I thought.

Like something out of a Paul Auster novel.

Would you have ignored it? Well, you’re better at ignoring your curiosity than I am.

Several days later, I wrote a polite letter asking a few questions. Still curious what this was all about (the book sitting ominously on my desk), his letter arrived and I was even more perplexed.

Soon enough, a new letter arrived.

It turns out he didn’t include any web-related contact information, because he doesn’t use the internet. Not at all.

The plot thickens, eh? More on this when I have more to report.




    1. I get the impression that publishing a photo of this guy’s letter would be against his code. He’s not on the internet for goodness sake. This would be the single thing that’d show up for him in an internet search.

      He doesn’t deserve that.

  1. You polish your work here? I knew I was doing something wrong. My posts are not as shiny as yours. I hope there is an app for that.

  2. I’d call the police. Possible terrorist has contacted you. Who doesn’t use the Internet?!?! Either he’s lying or he’s a terrorist. Put that book outside; it may have poison gas or explosives. Better to be safe & paranoid.

  3. I learned to type on a typewriter. My daughters marvel at that like I rode into town on a buckboard or a covered wagon. It’s certainly something you just do not see anymore.

  4. What do you mean “He’s not on the internet”? Not on the internet?! My 93 year old grandad is on the internet! (Actually, he’s working more offline now, but you can still find him on Google Earth. Literally. Sitting and waiting for the Google car.)

    1. That’s a good point. I shall give this luddite your grandfather’s contact information and encourage him to look him up on Google Earth.

      Oh, but wait. The guy can’t even fathom what that is. Because of the *no internet* thing. Hmmm…

  5. So, wait. Did you read the book? I want to know about the book. I am so curious about it.

    Also, I want a job where I receive books in the mail. This would be a very good job. How does one get this type of job? All I get in the mail are bills and junk. Although the other day I got a granola bar. It was probably poisoned. I ate it anyway. I haven’t died yet so I guess it was alright. It tasted like bananas.

    1. You know Amy, I really should do an update of this post. I did in fact meet the guy and it was simultaneously intriguing and disappointing.

      An update is definitely called for in this case.

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