Eurovision is like a really bad dream…that I slept through

Despite the fact that I know it’s ridiculous, I normally watch Eurovision annually. I seriously considered boycotting it this year because of some things I read about human rights abuses in Azerbaijan, but then it turned out none of the channels in the holiday flat in Spain had Eurovision playing. So, the decision was made for me.

Not like I think my boycott would make any difference whatsoever.

I did go through the videos of some of the entries, and thought I’d share them with you. Please remember, I don’t take this seriously (not sure how you can). The ones I like are the most satirical. The most sublime. Without any further ado…

Here’s Rambo Amadeus with ‘Euro Neuro‘:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6S-FNLv2jQ]

I have no idea what’s going on here, and this is my favourite sort of Eurovision entry. If you say to yourself, ‘What the hell was that?’ after a video, then that’s going in my top three or four.

Along that line is the entry from Israel. Here’s Izabo with the song ‘Time‘.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWMH6ID6Enc]

Because of Andreas, I felt I had to give Finland a fair listen. One of the typical Eurovision entries is the earnest ballad. This definitely fits in this category. Here, check it out:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43GWoVxRk2Y]

She’s apparently called Pernilla, and the song’s titled ‘När Jag Blundar’. It was oddly appealing, so I looked up the lyrics and then searched for the English translation. This is rarely a good idea. Here they are:

When I close my eyes

Close to each other, the scent of us two
Turns around, the same shirt but blue
The scent I sense would be nothing without you
Like an ocean without water,
like a lantern without light

A life without colours, that’s not you
Someone you see when you close your eyes
like an angel before you
Someone who helps you
fly when you’ve forgot how to do it

;

And then it goes on in the same vein…you get the idea.

How could I talk about this year’s Eurovision and not mention Buranovskive Babushki singing ‘Party for Everybody‘? Well, singing is putting it politely…caterwauling is more like it…but here they are:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKNRGc71hjc]

I hope they won.

(update: oh, it appears it wasn’t even on last night. And some of you didn’t even know about Eurovision. I suppose I’ll be writing more about it in that case…I’m pretty sure they livestream it round the world. Should be fun for any of you who’ve never experienced the spectacle)

16 comments

  1. Sadly you have not slept through it yet, maybe only dreamt about sleeping through it…the rehearsals are only starting and the shows start next week.

  2. Wow. OK, first, I didn’t know Eurovision was a thing. It’s like American Idol! Only…well, awful! And AWESOME!

    The first video wins because it’s a story about a man and his helper mule. Who doesn’t like that?

    The second video, I am quite sure, you put in to torment me. And then you were all, “Amy, check out my innocuous Eurovision blog!” SO MANY CLOWNS! Also, it sounds like “Dream Lover” by Bobby Darin. It was bugging me all the way through, then it hit me. It totally does. Listen. It does, right?

    I liked the earnest ballad except for the interpretive dancer bothering me all through it. Nothing good’s ever come from interpretive dance. Oh, wait, I take that back. It went over well in the movie “Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion.” And that’s it. Never again.

    I couldn’t force myself to get all the way through the Russian ladies. They were hurting my head. Ow.

    Explain this, please. This is a show? That happens, what, over a number of nights? And you get to – call in and vote, or something? That’s fun. Do good acts win? Or would the helper mule guy ever win because people were voting for what was awful, not what was honestly the best? That’s what I would vote for. I like the embarrassing underdog almost every time.

    1. I wish I could say that I purposely slipped a clown video in to torment you, but I forgot that you had clown issues. You and a lot of people, it turns out.

      I think you’d really like Eurovision. Am rather sure it’s live streamed. I’ll be in America when it’s on, so I’ll keep you informed.

  3. ZOMG, RAMBO IS ON A HELPER MULE!!! How could you neglect to mention that? Winner, winner, chicken dinner, right there. Also, I’m pretty sure I heard him say “I don’t like snow peas.” which is just the most hilarious.

    Up until a month or so ago, I had no idea what the Eurovision contest even was (because I’m Merkan and I barely pay attention to OUR televised singing contests). My Luxembourgish (Luxembourger?) friend (currently studying in Munich, btw. Coincidence?) took it upon herself to educate me.

    GO RAMBO, WOOO!

    1. I heard the snow peas thing, too. I’m totally Team Rambo Helper Mule. Although he looks like he’d probably be a date rapist. Or at least a peeping tom.

      1. Agreed. I did a little research, and apparently he’s considered something of a Serbian Frank Zappa.

        I think it was the omnipresent beanie that made me laugh the hardest. My 5 year old constantly wears his, too.

    1. The babushkas definitely get points for the dentures. And for their enthusiasm.

      But their singing? That singing was horrible.

      I wonder how they’ll do in the voting.

  4. I’m so flummoxed by this whole thing. This is just so … much.

    But, I totally play my synthesizer while wearing lingerie and looking vaguely disinterested in the freakish clowns dancing around me. This may be after a cocktail and a tranquilizer, but it was real to ME.

    1. What you’re describing definitely needs to be filmed and uploaded to either YouTube or SoundCloud at the very least. You’ve got at least one fan in this humble blogger.

  5. Oh, oh, oh, thank you for pointing me to Rambo Amadeus’ contribution to the Grand Prix! Although I’m late to the party, I’ll still comment, because I didn’t know that he participated in the Eurovision thingy, because I don’t watch the pre-show-shows. But Rambo Amadeus! sj is right, he’s something like the Montenegrin Frank Zappa, you can’t take him seriously at all, but at the same time he’s more serious than anything all the other Serbian/Montenegrin singers come up with. This is so great, thank you! Also, he’s crazy. There’s one song where he only repeats “Everybody dance now” in a deadpan voice with Eurotrash-beats as accompaniment. I saw him play it live and almost peed my pants laughing.

    1. Hey, thanks for commenting. So glad you liked the blogpost.

      Although we don’t have anything *quite* like Rambo Amadeus here in Germany, there’s a bit of whimsy left in the music world.

      And I try to provide as much of it as I can.

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